Cowardice

“They carried the common secret of cowardice barely restrained, the instinct to run or freeze or hide, and in many respects this was the heaviest burden of all, for it could never be put down, it required perfect balance and perfect posture.” (O’Brien Pg. 20)

This bit of the book stood out to me because of how O’Brien describes cowardice. I have gone through a lot to get familiar and even invite cowardice over for a cup of coffee. So, know what he means by keeping “perfect balance and perfect posture.” Trying to control your emotions throughout the day and hope that no one can tell that your actually falling apart. Keeping your head up and pretend that “it” doesn’t bother you.

These soldiers had to fight everyday to stay alive and keep their heads up regardless of the pain and fear that they hid. Now this sentence also makes me think, if in order to stay alive you hide to hide what you actually felt to stay alive, could that lead to violence acts in order to look brave?

http://members.tripod.com/atif_nazir/unforget_photos.htm

I have a friend that I have grown up with since elementary school, and she's living through hell because she won't speak up. She hides her fear in order to not put her family in danger. But what good is that if she can never live in peace and her children abused? Thousands of woman are beaten, killed, raped because not of their cowardice but because of the cowardice of others. War is the same horrible crimes are made because you can’t show that you are afraid, be strong for the troops. You do need to be strong and put things into perspective but that does not justify the things done in war. War is a messy you never know where you might find yourself, the murderer or the victim.

http://www.nocaptionneeded.com/index.php?s=memorialized

Here is a link about photographs that had caputure war.

What makes a poem?

This is a last minute blog once again so; I will try to be blunt. Form my short essay number two, I decided to write about “Charlie Howard’s Descent” by Mark Doty. In the short  explanation of the poem it is about a gay hate-crime in Bangor, Maine 1984. It is written in the perspective of the victim. Now after reading both articles I found myself (literally contemplating for maybe three minutes) that they both have truths about the poem I chose. This poem is “neither emotional nor political” like, Carolyn Forche may describe but like Sam Hamill “it as deep truth.”  Sam Hamill describe about the truth that is hidden between every silence. The distinction between speaking the elements for what they are and the ignorance of the blind. Sam Hamill talks about violence in its distinct forms. He himself talks about a very traumatic event in his life, being gang raped and stabbed left to die. Charlie Howard dealt with what Sam Hamill describes, “Every fourth homosexual male in a U.S. high school is the victim of a major assault during his venture.”(Hamill Pg.553). During his articles he explains that the reason of such crimes are because we tend to hide or ignore the truth for our own sake or the “children’s” sake. We think that because we don’t talk about them violence doesn’t occur. Carolyn Forche talks about war, exiled, or prisoner poets and how they don’t see black and white like we mostly do. She says that poems are not all black and white “we distinguish between “personal” and “political” poems- the former calling to mind lyrics of love and emotional loss….” For Charlie Howard he is both. IT was emotional by the way he had died and his last moments of panic but also brought attention to hate-crimes state wide.

http://www.smashingmagazine.com/2008/06/09/beautiful-black-and-white-photography/

Here is a timeline of controverersial poets over history.

Descent and Thirteenth Floor

I picked this two mainly because I did a little research on both of them and discovered that I had a little in common with both of them. Charlie Howard was actually a hate-crime the author wrote of how he felt or thought during his last minutes. Charlie Howard was teased to the point of his death. His death got a lot of attention nationally in the news and gave more light about hate-crimes. Joy Harjo’s “The Woman Hanging from the Thirteenth Floor Window” is about how everyone handles their destiny and the choices we make. We can either make the best choice possible or hang from the thirteenth floor window.

http://www.allaboutbipolar.com/2009/08/25/falling-sensation-is-this-psychosis/



These two poems did not really impact me at first mainly because I don't really like reading poems.

 Unless I know what they are talking about. That is why I went ahead and did some research. I found

out that the poem "Charlie Howard's Descent" was crime committed in Bangor, Maine July 7, 1984.

Three young man made the decion to tease and chase Charlie Howard and his friend till pushing him

over a bridge to his death.

I love to read about crimes and the fact that the poem is about a crime and

the maybe last thoughts of the victim gave it more feeling. "The Woman Hanging from the Thirteenth

Floor Window" definatly got to me beacause its about lifes decisons and three years ago I had to make

a life changing decison. I had to decide if to keep my baby or abortion. I kept her and life is upside

down loving every minute. Both of them talk about two completely different thing but have the same

meaning everything is about the decions you make with your life and others.

If you want to know more about Charlie Howard or hate-crimes Here is a link that might be

interesting.

Summary Vs. Analysis

One of the differences from a summary to an analysis is that a summary is just an overall view to a story. Analysis on the other hand is picking a part of the story an deciding how its vital to the entire whole. One of my favorite book's since I was a young girl was "Matilda" by Roald Dahl. In my point of view and how I would a very short summary of the story is by saying, "Matilda is a novel written by Roald Dahl about a six year old child that developes powers in order to help her escape from her parents and help her wonderfull teacher escape her aunts reing of terror over an elementary."

http://www.kidsmomo.com/2011/matilda-a-musical/

On the other hand if I were to write an analysis for "Matilda" I would say, "Matilda is a child that has delt with child abuse and neglect from her parents and how adopting is an option for most children that have been abused." Analysis is to make a thesis and argument and have evidence of your argument and how it is important to the story.

I figured what a better way than to see summaries than through book reviews here is a link about book reviews of Roald Dahl's novel.

English102 Introduction Video

http://youtu.be/Yfg-xf4ExxY

Nabokov: What makes a good readrer?

Nabokov had a theory about what makes a good reader. Is he someone that as an imagination? Or someone that puts his feelings into the story making human connection? Nabokov believed that for a good reader to understand the story he had to understand the writer. He had to understand that the writer is a deciever and manipulator. He will make you believe somthing that could be a complete lie. That is why he also believed that good readers and not the ones that compare their lives to a character or a story but does that as the imagination to see past the words and into the writers point of view.

 I for one belive that his theory was correct in both aspects. Someone that is a good reader shoul be able to make a connection but also seperate feelings from a completely imaginative story. We can't fully understand someone elses point of view with our own emotions in the way. A reader should have the imagination to see and feel and smell what is going on in the book. It's like a movie playing directly in your mind to see the writers own thoughts.

Nabokov:http://www.hunter.cuny.edu/classics/russian/courses-1/nabokov

In my opinion a "good reader" isn't the one that can read the book the fastes or write a huge report on it over nothing. To me a good reader is one that has the full understanding that the writer is trying to get through. Writers are decivers because no matter what they write they always want you on their side. A good reader is the one that see the writers thoughts and in the end decide what was or is real. One that can picture the story and be completely sucked into it and appear in a distant land or in the middle of the jungle constantly on the move because of a war but seperat from the story.

I consider myself an awful reader. Not because I can't read but because no matter what I read I get caught up in the same opinion over and over. I pick bits from a story and make my own philosophy. I don't think really what the author is getting through most of the time. But I guess even then Nabokov would consider me a good reader because evn though sometimes I don't fully grasp the concept I still seperate myself from the writer to see my own truth.

Here is a link that is an essay that explains Nabokov's essay over "good readers."